


Far Better

by Rogue of Heart (Akumeoi)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-11
Updated: 2012-11-11
Packaged: 2018-10-18 13:21:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10617741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akumeoi/pseuds/Rogue%20of%20Heart
Summary: Dolorosa/Mindfang character study, reflecting on their relationship. Inspired by [x].





	

I hope you enjoyed the Dolorosa while she was yours, Mindfang. Pretending to love her was the closest you ever came to knowing anything beyond the narrow borders of your lowly criminal life. What is an endless caliguous dance in all quadrants - make no mistake, your red quadrants were never truly red, or you would not have had to force your so-called matesprits into them - compared to the pure, boundless love of a mother for her children?

The only troll on Alternia ever to feel this quiet but fierce warmth, and all you found in her mind when you took her was her fear. All you looked for in her was whether she could unbutton fast enough and if her horns were still sharp. If only you had known how easily she could be lead to love without any manipulation at all!

But you didn't bother to check. You assumed that she, like you, had a heart as black, destructive, and volatile as an oil slick, instead of a heart as clean and wide as the oceans you sailed over. But then, what was the ocean to you, except a mode of getting places, something that was there for you use that you would despoil if you could? Did you imagine that beneath the deck of your armoured warship there was a world full of life and light that you could have visited any time you wished? 

You felt the Dolorosa's fear, yes, but did you feel her courage? Her strength of heart? It had to be there, else how could she have survived the hideous death of her son, the pillar of her religion and her greatest love, plus the destruction of the hearts and souls of her friends, and her own enslavement? 

The loss of true love is not something you thought you needed to fear, Mindfang, since you gazed into that curséd cue ball of yours. So you felt that you could take other trolls' true loves, use them until they were empty, and throw them aside with the trash. But the Dolorosa's heart was a golden treasure, perhaps a tarnished one, but a treasure nonetheless. In the end it was probably better that Dualscar murdered her before you could find that out. 

For all the shame she suffered, it was better that she end her life with some measure of dignity, rather than having lived as your unwitting pawn for the rest of it. 

It is far better that you never found her true capacity to love, which you would have looted and plundered like a fat merchant vessel. 

It is far, far better that you never raised your eyes from the smoggy horizons and looked to the gleaming oceans or to the shining skies. 

Who knows what kind of woman you would have become after tasting the stars?

It is far better that the Dolorosa die, so that she could join her son once again, before you could erase his memory from her wretched mind.


End file.
